{"id":7084,"date":"2016-03-27T15:20:47","date_gmt":"2016-03-27T19:20:47","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/esr.ibiblio.org\/?p=7084"},"modified":"2016-03-27T21:12:49","modified_gmt":"2016-03-28T01:12:49","slug":"evil-viziers-represent","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/esr.ibiblio.org\/?p=7084","title":{"rendered":"Evil viziers represent!"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Over on G+, Peter da Silva <a href=\"https:\/\/plus.google.com\/+PeterdaSilva\/posts\/7tTZEkgGuWt\">wrote<\/a>: &#8216;I just typoed &#8220;goatee&#8221; as &#8220;gloatee&#8221; and now I&#8217;m wondering why it wasn&#8217;t always spelled that way.&#8217; #evilviziersrepresent #muahaha<\/p>\n<p>The estimable Mr. da Silva is sadly in error.  I played the evil vizier in the first run of the Arabian Nights LARP back in 1987. No goatee, and didn&#8217;t gloat even once, was much too busy being <em>efficiently<\/em> cruel and clever.<\/p>\n<p>What, you think this sort of thing is just fun and games?  Despotic oriental storybook kingdoms don&#8217;t run themselves, you know.  That takes <em>functionaries<\/em>.  Somebody gotta keep the wheels turning while that overweight good-for-nothing Caliph lounges on his divan smoking bhang and being fanned by slavegirls.  Or being bhanged by slavegirls and smoking his divan. Whatever.<\/p>\n<p>A thankless job it is too.  You keep everything prosperous and orderly with a bare <em>minimum<\/em> of floggings, beheadings, castrations, and miscreants torn apart by camels, and your reward is a constant stream of idiot heroes with oversized scimitars trying to slit your weasand.  With the Caliph&#8217;s daughter looking all starry-eyed as they try it on &#8211; now there&#8217;s a girl who&#8217;s way too impressed by an oversized, er, scimitar.<\/p>\n<p>Now if you&#8217;ll excuse me I need to go see a man about a lamp.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Over on G+, Peter da Silva wrote: &#8216;I just typoed &#8220;goatee&#8221; as &#8220;gloatee&#8221; and now I&#8217;m wondering why it wasn&#8217;t always spelled that way.&#8217; #evilviziersrepresent #muahaha The estimable Mr. da Silva is sadly in error. I played the evil vizier in the first run of the Arabian Nights LARP back in 1987. No goatee, and&hellip; <a class=\"more-link\" href=\"http:\/\/esr.ibiblio.org\/?p=7084\">Continue reading <span class=\"screen-reader-text\">Evil viziers represent!<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-7084","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-general","entry"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/esr.ibiblio.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7084","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/esr.ibiblio.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/esr.ibiblio.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/esr.ibiblio.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/esr.ibiblio.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=7084"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"http:\/\/esr.ibiblio.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7084\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":7089,"href":"http:\/\/esr.ibiblio.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7084\/revisions\/7089"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/esr.ibiblio.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=7084"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/esr.ibiblio.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=7084"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/esr.ibiblio.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=7084"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}